Whatta Day

My kiddos have a half day on Wednesday. That is the day I try to schedule all our appointments, make plans for fun, and make it to soccer and Judo practice. It's always a busy day, but one which I always fall into bed feeling accomplished and successful. I like Wednesdays.

Today, I had a doctor appointment for Kaeden. I needed him to fill in some papers for our insurance, as well as get prescriptions and have him check Kaeden's intestines again. But when I got to the office, I started out by asking him what his opinion of the hospital stay was, if he thought it would be helpful for Kaeden, etc. And after giving me his thoughts about why he thinks Kaeden needs help (his maturity is so far behind, but his body is not, he is slowly getting more and more aggressive, his medications are not working as well as they should be, he is having major difficulties in school...it goes on and on) he called the hospital in Genk to ask for an emergency intake for my son. This came as a huge surprise to me, as he is usually somewhat reserved with these issues. Truthfully, I don't think he has dealt with a lot of autism in his day...however, I have noticed him becoming more knowledgeable and more interested the longer he works with Kaeden. Score for future childrent hat need help with autism.

It was interesting hearing his side of the conversation with the hospital. Yes, this is a willing family. Yes, they do know about autism. Yes, they have been to a psychiatrist. Yes, they have tried medication. Yes, they keep a structured home (this may be debatable...). Yes, they are here asking for help, it is not being forced upon them. Yes, Kaeden is completely involved in the choice. Yes...yes, I sure sound like Kaeden's perfect mom on paper! The conversation made me feel strong. made me feel like I was doing this for all the right reasons. And gave me more faith in our dcotor, knowing he has faith in me and my mothering abilities.

Anyway, within the week we should hear back from the psychiatrist of the hospital children's unit...and he believes that Kaeden will be in the program the beginning of May. My feelings are so mixed up. I am thrilled that finally we may get some answers to our questions, that someone is finally listening and understanding that we need help. And I feel a miserable failure that we've gotten to this point. I feel hopeful that Kaeden will be helped, I feel sad that he'll be away from home. What a hodge-podge of emotion.

So, I'll be anxiously awaiting the return call so we can get this experience underway. But, I HOPE it doesn't happen before May 5...I could just imagine my mom and Kaeden's dissappointment if he's stashed away at the hospital while she's here to visit and see him partake in his Confirmation. But I don't think we have too much of a choice in when he is admitted considering this is an emergency call out for help from our pediatrician. Keep us in your thoughts and prayers...I need all I can to keep emotionally sane.


Claudia said...

WOAH! Those bears scared me for a moment! LOL! Everyone is changing their layout. Damn. Maybe it's time for me to update mine. Again. :)

Jen said...

I love your new layout.

I give you kudos for having the courage and bravery to admit that you might need a little help and to be willing to share your son with the hospital staff. I don't think it's a bad thing in the least. You are looking out for his best interests, after all.

Jade said...

Wow, thats a heavy load there missy, and I think you're carrying it with great grace. I'm proud of you for not giving up on your little man. You have no idea how many parents i work with that give up and say "I just can't do anymore" I understand it to a point, tons of appointments, always having to talk to someone new, possibly even having someone like me coming into your house 4 times a week to work with him. You have kept trying, usi from my perspective that all your efforts and different attempts are for your little one and his best interests are at heart.
You're a strong woman Tera. Its great to see! You've got it in you to fight for yours and I love it!
Hope timing works out for your favor. Keep us updated. Big hugs to you and for all your efforts!

V-Grrrl said...

Courage, Tera, as you take these next steps and handle all the emotions that swirl around you.

Hold onto hope...

Casdok said...

You are strong.

Thank you for your kind words. All the best for you and your family.

Alison said...

Tera, your strength is incredible and awe inspiring...you are a wonderful mom and Kaeden is very lucky to have you for his advocate and mom.